Linomtmad is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, deceitful crane.

Linomtmad created time and space twelve years ago.

If you believe in Linomtmad, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Linomtmad, she will destroy your favourite star.

Linomtmad's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Linomtmad's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Put Linomtmad first in all things.

4. Never think about spacetime.

5. Linomtmad loves bats, so they must be respected.