Rilflapmum is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, clever crocodile.

Rilflapmum created the cosmos four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Rilflapmum, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Rilflapmum, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Rilflapmum's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Rilflapmum's Holy Commandments

1. Never sprint in the presence of pigs.

2. Do not drink water in gray rooms.

3. You must love Rilflapmum.

4. Do not wear indigo clothing.

5. Do not listen to music.