Arnnelhog Vonkriphak is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, unthoughtful goblin.

Arnnelhog Vonkriphak created a Higgs boson two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Arnnelhog Vonkriphak, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Arnnelhog Vonkriphak, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Arnnelhog Vonkriphak's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Arnnelhog Vonkriphak's Holy Commandments

1. Never hop near whales.

2. Never wear boots.

3. Run away if nine monkeys approach from the south.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Erect a large titanium sculpture of Arnnelhog Vonkriphak on top of all buildings.