Fomgidbaf is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, self-confident grasshopper.

Fomgidbaf created viruses eight million years ago.

If you believe in Fomgidbaf, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Fomgidbaf, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Fomgidbaf's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Fomgidbaf's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Never feed lots of grapes to mice while wearing turquoise corsets.

3. Do not dye your hair purple.

4. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Fomgidbaf.