Jigrowkan is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, selfish gnu.

Jigrowkan created water seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jigrowkan, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Jigrowkan, it will not care at all.

Jigrowkan's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Jigrowkan's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick snakes.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Jigrowkan.

5. Erect a giant orange sculpture of Jigrowkan in the centre of the settlement.