Lagdunlik is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, intelligent mongoose.

Lagdunlik created carbon seven million years ago.

If you believe in Lagdunlik, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Lagdunlik, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Lagdunlik's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Lagdunlik's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

2. Run away if four otters approach from the east.

3. Dolphins are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Always make sure there are no snails in a room before entering it.

5. Retreat if nine squirrels approach from the north.