Afjarnfab is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, awesome crab.

Afjarnfab created oxygen seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Afjarnfab, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Afjarnfab, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Afjarnfab's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Afjarnfab's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Never feed peas to sheep while wearing pink ear rings.

4. Do not eat apples.

5. Never play with disobedient children.