Kadtadmit is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, benevolent salamander.

Kadtadmit created water five million years ago.

If you believe in Kadtadmit, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Kadtadmit, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Kadtadmit's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Kadtadmit's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity near birds while wearing mauve tights and balancing eight silver spheres on your chest.

2. Feed all hungry aardvarks.

3. Never think about dwarf planets.

4. Never write about cell theory.

5. Never eat green fruit.