Femlidhen is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, unthoughtful rat.

Femlidhen created gold eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Femlidhen, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Femlidhen, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Femlidhen's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Femlidhen's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from mauve eagles for they are unholy.

2. Do not dye your hair yellow.

3. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Put Femlidhen first in all things.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.