Wadbastwot is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, slow faun.

Wadbastwot created parasitic wasps nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Wadbastwot, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Wadbastwot, she will come to you in dreams.

Wadbastwot's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Wadbastwot's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Wadbastwot.

2. Never feed lots of lemons to dolphins while wearing pink trousers.

3. Retreat if five horses approach from the south.

4. Do not kill foxes.

5. Do not wear violet clothing.