Ladwitcemtap is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, clever chicken.

Ladwitcemtap created Mount Everest eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ladwitcemtap, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Ladwitcemtap, he will turn you into a duck.

Ladwitcemtap's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Ladwitcemtap's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant orange sculpture of Ladwitcemtap in the centre of the settlement.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Ladwitcemtap.