Gomweebeg is a god.

It takes the form of a small, uncaring armadillo.

Gomweebeg created viruses three billion years ago.

If you believe in Gomweebeg, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Gomweebeg, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Gomweebeg's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Gomweebeg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of titanium.

2. Never talk about thermodynamics near grasshopers while wearing blue boots.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Gomweebeg must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Always treat dolphins with great respect.