Dumvindid is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, selfish hare.

Dumvindid created a charm quark five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dumvindid, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Dumvindid, it will turn you into a worm.

Dumvindid's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Dumvindid's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from magenta cats for they are unholy.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Never think about gravity near hamsters while wearing pink corsets and balancing five zinc spheres on your feet.