Artbellomtwod is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, stupid pigeon.

Artbellomtwod created the universe three million years ago.

If you believe in Artbellomtwod, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Artbellomtwod, it will turn you into a slug.

Artbellomtwod's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Artbellomtwod's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate snails.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Never talk about electromagnetism near gulls while wearing cyan coats and balancing nine tin spheres on your neck.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.