Hunpoglin is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, ruthless swan.

Hunpoglin created the Small Magellanic Cloud five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hunpoglin, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Hunpoglin, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Hunpoglin's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Hunpoglin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Always make sure there are no porpoises in a building before entering it.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Do not shave your head.

5. Always help moths in need.
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