Arnmadlab is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, kind swallow.

Arnmadlab created carbon seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Arnmadlab, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Arnmadlab, she will not care at all.

Arnmadlab's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Arnmadlab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your feet.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Never paint your neck violet.

4. Never think ill of sick eagles.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.