Gidtipsas is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, tranquil hyena.

Gidtipsas created a Higgs boson four billion years ago.

If you believe in Gidtipsas, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Gidtipsas, he will turn you into a snail.

Gidtipsas' most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Gidtipsas' Holy Commandments

1. Hide if three seals approach from the east.

2. Never wear mauve skirts.

3. Do not hurt grasshopers.

4. Never paint your neck brown.

5. Never play with disobedient children.