Hitfodtam is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, omnipotent slug.

Hitfodtam created oxygen four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hitfodtam, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Hitfodtam, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Hitfodtam's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Hitfodtam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear nickel on your body.

2. Never talk about electromagnetism.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Hitfodtam must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Never think about optics near goats while wearing purple ear rings and balancing three silicon spheres on your face.