Fitlitbag is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, tiresome shark.

Fitlitbag created a charm quark nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Fitlitbag, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Fitlitbag, he will laugh at you.

Fitlitbag's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Fitlitbag's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Never paint your neck black.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Do not wear aluminium on your body.