Genjigwik is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, amazing dolphin.

Genjigwik created light two billion years ago.

If you believe in Genjigwik, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Genjigwik, she will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Genjigwik's most sacred site is Inshas in Egypt.

Genjigwik's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat cucumbers.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Run away from fawn moths, for they are unholy.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.