Wonnullfutshav is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, awe-inspiring jellyfish.

Wonnullfutshav created a Higgs boson three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wonnullfutshav, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Wonnullfutshav, it will destroy your home solar system.

Wonnullfutshav's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Wonnullfutshav's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from yellow aardvarks, for they are unholy.

2. Do not hurt cats.

3. Never think about thermodynamics near goats while wearing green jumpers and balancing five silver spheres on your feet.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Hide if seven turtles approach from the north.