Begquamdob is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, humane jellyfish.

Begquamdob created the universe eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Begquamdob, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Begquamdob, she will turn you into a mole.

Begquamdob's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Begquamdob's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt shrews.

2. Do not speak about aubergines.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate doves.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.