Taplogsand is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, astonishing spider.

Taplogsand created a top quark eight million years ago.

If you believe in Taplogsand, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Taplogsand, she will laugh at you.

Taplogsand's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Taplogsand's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant carbon sculpture of Taplogsand in the centre of the settlement.

2. Put Taplogsand first in all things.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Always make sure there are no rats in a room before entering it.

5. Never paint your back violet.