Fidortstip is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, thoughtless bird.

Fidortstip created snails two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fidortstip, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Fidortstip, she will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Fidortstip's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Fidortstip's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Always treat pigs with great respect.

5. Never eat cucumbers.