Dutziglarp is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, ruthless fly.

Dutziglarp created the planet Mars six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dutziglarp, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Dutziglarp, she will destroy your home solar system.

Dutziglarp's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Dutziglarp's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Never wear hats.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.