Figcunban Getlamlabmipgebbegnibcub Basshudtin is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, unsympathetic scorpion.

Figcunban Getlamlabmipgebbegnibcub Basshudtin created snails four million years ago.

If you believe in Figcunban Getlamlabmipgebbegnibcub Basshudtin, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Figcunban Getlamlabmipgebbegnibcub Basshudtin, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Figcunban Getlamlabmipgebbegnibcub Basshudtin's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Figcunban Getlamlabmipgebbegnibcub Basshudtin's Holy Commandments

1. Erect nine tin sculptures of Figcunban Getlamlabmipgebbegnibcub Basshudtin on top of important buildings.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Do not speak about limes.

4. Never think about gravity near swans while wearing blue scarves and balancing four silver spheres on your face.

5. Always obey Figcunban Getlamlabmipgebbegnibcub Basshudtin's priests.