Natquatweg is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, generous wren.

Natquatweg created a strange quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Natquatweg, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Natquatweg, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Natquatweg's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Natquatweg's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about special relativity near porpoises while wearing black coats and balancing three gold spheres on your neck.

2. Always treat hamsters with great respect.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not cook food in pots.