Gardutfar is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, quiet scorpion.

Gardutfar created time and space nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Gardutfar, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Gardutfar, he will destroy your home solar system.

Gardutfar's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Gardutfar's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about special relativity near birds while wearing violet shirts and balancing eight platinum spheres on your neck.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Never think about gravity near foxes while wearing fawn ear rings and balancing seven gold spheres on your head.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Gardutfar.