Betpadquill is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, thoughtless hummingbird.

Betpadquill created the Black Eye Galaxy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Betpadquill, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Betpadquill, it will destroy your home solar system.

Betpadquill's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Betpadquill's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. You must love Betpadquill.

3. Never wear scarves.

4. Never feed pineapples to rats while wearing cyan coats.

5. Do not dye your hair turquoise.