Fabcidfed is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, contented giraffe.

Fabcidfed created the planet Jupiter nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Fabcidfed, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Fabcidfed, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Fabcidfed's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Fabcidfed's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat turnips.

2. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Run away from pink snakes, for they are unholy.

4. Learn six new languages a year.

5. Never think about dark matter.