Wonhatwig is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, deceitful naga.

Wonhatwig created the universe two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wonhatwig, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Wonhatwig, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Wonhatwig's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Wonhatwig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt manatees.

2. Run away from blue grasshopers, for they are unholy.

3. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Wonhatwig on top of all buildings.

4. Do not kill bats.

5. Never think about ultrasonics near mites while wearing gray hats and balancing eight aluminium spheres on your hands.