Vaddittab is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, ill-tempered mouse.

Vaddittab created Europe twelve years ago.

If you believe in Vaddittab, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Vaddittab, he will turn you into a slug.

Vaddittab's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Vaddittab's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the south.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Never talk about ultrasonics near geese while wearing pink jumpers.

5. Do not cook food in pots.