Pakdadgat is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, competent penguin.

Pakdadgat created life two years ago.

If you believe in Pakdadgat, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Pakdadgat, it will torture you forever.

Pakdadgat's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Pakdadgat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Do not keep six goats in a large pit.

3. Never think about archaea.

4. Always make sure there are no porpoises in a room before entering it.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.