Vagfotmut Arprotwap is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, kind jellyfish.

Vagfotmut Arprotwap created oxygen three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vagfotmut Arprotwap, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Vagfotmut Arprotwap, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Vagfotmut Arprotwap's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Vagfotmut Arprotwap's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Always treat frogs with great respect.

3. Never wear ear rings.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Never feed lentils to great tits while wearing boots.