Yatthotjen is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, unsympathetic pig.

Yatthotjen created dark matter three billion years ago.

If you believe in Yatthotjen, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Yatthotjen, he will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Yatthotjen's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Yatthotjen's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Yatthotjen must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Do not dye your hair white.

4. Dolphins are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Never eat green fruit.