Badcipjarn Bimbidxin is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, wise grasshopper.

Badcipjarn Bimbidxin created the planet Saturn eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Badcipjarn Bimbidxin, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Badcipjarn Bimbidxin, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Badcipjarn Bimbidxin's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Badcipjarn Bimbidxin's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant iron sculpture of Badcipjarn Bimbidxin in the centre of the settlement.

2. Always wear black.

3. Never write about gravity.

4. Learn nine new languages a year.

5. Never pour water over plants.