Dossjarnben is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, prudent salamander.

Dossjarnben created the Sombrero Galaxy four million years ago.

If you believe in Dossjarnben, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Dossjarnben, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Dossjarnben's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Dossjarnben's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Always make sure there are no monkeys in a building before entering it.

3. Always obey Dossjarnben's priests.

4. Do not shave your feet.

5. Never mention great tits.