Pig Gepbeststighun is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, sapient butterfly.

Pig Gepbeststighun created carbon nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pig Gepbeststighun, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Pig Gepbeststighun, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Pig Gepbeststighun's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Pig Gepbeststighun's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Learn three new languages a year.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Feed all hungry tortoises.

5. Never sing near otters.