Tofbestcuss Dimnartrag is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, passionate badger.

Tofbestcuss Dimnartrag created a bottom quark four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tofbestcuss Dimnartrag, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Tofbestcuss Dimnartrag, he will not invite you to parties.

Tofbestcuss Dimnartrag's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Tofbestcuss Dimnartrag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Tofbestcuss Dimnartrag.