Dumpangvig is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, self-assured slug.

Dumpangvig created the Sol system six million years ago.

If you believe in Dumpangvig, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Dumpangvig, he will turn you into a duck.

Dumpangvig's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Dumpangvig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Dumpangvig's name in vain.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

5. Always help mice in need.