Naknulloop is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, emotional dryad.

Naknulloop created humankind two billion years ago.

If you believe in Naknulloop, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Naknulloop, she will laugh at you.

Naknulloop's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Naknulloop's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat bread.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

4. Never talk about dark matter near monkeys while wearing yellow tights.

5. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.