Nartnilmin is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, awe-inspiring faun.

Nartnilmin created Asia six billion years ago.

If you believe in Nartnilmin, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Nartnilmin, it will turn you into a goat.

Nartnilmin's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Nartnilmin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of zinc.

3. Nartnilmin must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Nartnilmin loves snakes, so they must be honoured.