Libwanflan is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, deceitful chinchilla.

Libwanflan created Africa twelve years ago.

If you believe in Libwanflan, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Libwanflan, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Libwanflan's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Libwanflan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Erect three zinc sculptures of Libwanflan on top of important buildings.

4. Never talk about fluid mechanics near pigs while wearing violet tights.

5. Do not make images of living things.