Gigdobpark Vedjipquat is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, grumpy scorpion.

Gigdobpark Vedjipquat created the Small Magellanic Cloud six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gigdobpark Vedjipquat, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Gigdobpark Vedjipquat, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Gigdobpark Vedjipquat's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Gigdobpark Vedjipquat's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Gigdobpark Vedjipquat's priests.

2. Never feed apples to nematodes while wearing shirts.

3. Do not take Gigdobpark Vedjipquat's name in vain.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Always help pigs in need.