Tamcantonk is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, all-powerful swan.

Tamcantonk created an up quark eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tamcantonk, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Tamcantonk, it will turn you into a mouse.

Tamcantonk's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Tamcantonk's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Tamcantonk.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Do not dye your hair violet.