Dotjonkinfed Dimbunkarquat Hanzagbut is a god.

He takes the form of a large, resourceful grasshopper.

Dotjonkinfed Dimbunkarquat Hanzagbut created a down quark nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dotjonkinfed Dimbunkarquat Hanzagbut, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Dotjonkinfed Dimbunkarquat Hanzagbut, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Dotjonkinfed Dimbunkarquat Hanzagbut's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Dotjonkinfed Dimbunkarquat Hanzagbut's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Never think ill of sick ants.

4. Do not eat onions.

5. Always stare at clouds.