Tailyogquaf is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, bad-tempered mole.

Tailyogquaf created the Sol system six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tailyogquaf, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Tailyogquaf, she will boil you in a big pot.

Tailyogquaf's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Tailyogquaf's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured dolphins.

2. Never laugh in the presence of dogs.

3. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place in cyan.