Dumdadnak is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, ill-tempered gerbil.

Dumdadnak created a down quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Dumdadnak, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Dumdadnak, she will try to impress you with trees.

Dumdadnak's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Dumdadnak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your legs.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Draw representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Never talk about ultrasonics near snakes while wearing blue dresses and balancing six silver spheres on your neck.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Dumdadnak.