Cibcadfat is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, strong squid.

Cibcadfat created Mount Everest four billion years ago.

If you believe in Cibcadfat, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Cibcadfat, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Cibcadfat's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Cibcadfat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Never feed peanuts to turtles while wearing indigo hats.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of tin.

5. Do not chop down trees.