Bomlaghad is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, conceited camel.

Bomlaghad created a down quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Bomlaghad, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bomlaghad, he will turn you into a small brown duck.

Bomlaghad's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Bomlaghad's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry turtles.

2. Never feed lots of nuts to tortoises while wearing fawn jumpers.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Always help badgers.

5. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.